I have never been one to tackle hands-on projects. Definitely not a DIY'er. Those of you who know me would attest to that.
Couple that with my difficulty asking others for help, and most non-essential projects around my house take an awfully long time to get done.
But the past few weeks have started to change my mindset a bit.
I picked up a hand sander for the first time in my life this weekend.
And actually used it - to sand an entire dining room table top!
A few years back, my oldest son decided he wanted to make a slow motion video of birthday candles, filming them as they were burning out.
He chose to line them up in a circle - on a paper plate.
In the middle of my pinewood dining room table.
By the time those candles burned down to the paper plate, they had scorched circles into my table top.
That was four years ago. I've been covering them with a table runner ever since. Out of sight, out of mind, right?
I've talked in general with others about helping me get it sanded and re-stained. But I didn't make it a priority in my life. And I certainly never attempted to fix it myself.
I think that's because I have never seen myself as a handy person. I put up my own mental roadblock that prevented me from even trying.
But there's something about a lockdown at home that gives me courage I guess.
And you know what? I actually enjoyed the therapeutic energy that came with sanding that table.
The best part was the satisfaction I felt when the table was sanded down to the bare wood and those scorch marks were gone.
It was like a clean slate.
My arms are sore today, but in a good way. And I'm proud of myself for having the courage to get past that mental roadblock and tackle this project.
This lockdown is teaching me a few things about the DIY'er in me:
That I can do more physical things myself than I ever thought I could (and enjoy them!)
That there are too many other types of things I do myself that I should let other people help me with.
The hard part is that I've lived most of my life without relying on other people. Mostly because I wasn't surrounded by very many I could rely on.
I worked hard all through high school and paid my own way through college. I've poured my heart and soul into my career which has resulted in my ability to have a nice home and financial security for myself and my boys.
When it comes to the physical act of fixing things, though - I've generally left those to the experts. And probably spent more money than I should have in the process!
But I also know that in some cases being a do-it-yourselfer isn't a good thing.
I know that surrounding yourself with people who want to and can help you is therapy in and of itself.
It's ironic that it takes a lockdown and a furlough to clear my mind enough to see that. And to realize that I'm not the only one who suffers from that type of DIY thinking.
So if you need a project done around your house...don't actually call me.
One successfully sanded table does not an expert handy-woman make.
But if you need an ear to listen, or a sounding board for ideas and suggestions on how to survive a challenge you are facing, feel free to reach out.
I'm happy to help in any way I can.
Just give me a couple of hours before you call - I have a table to finish staining!
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