My new car warns me when it's cold outside.
I'm not even joking.
A warning comes up on my dash with a thermometer symbol and it ominously tells me, "Low Outside Temperature."
Really? Like I didn't feel that when I got out into my car in the first place?
I wonder what the purpose of that warning is. Is it intended to be a prompt for me to turn on my heated seats? Or a signal to put my gloves on when I get out of the car?
Either way, this struck me funny when it happened yesterday. Truly stating what to me was obvious.
And of course it made me reflect on life.
There are so many times when we say things that we shouldn't say. But ironically, there are even more times when we should say things that we think are obvious to those around us, but in reality they aren't.
Sometimes we take it for granted that the people we love know what we need, how we are feeling, or even how we feel about them.
It's human nature for us to get so caught up in our own lives that it's difficult to have space in our brains and our hearts to be in tune with those around us.
I'm not saying we are selfish, just that we need to communicate.
I've learned (the hard way) that it's not realistic to expect that our kids, our family or even our partners are thinking or feeling the same way that we do.
I'm guilty of this too - especially with my kids.
I just expect that they look around the house and see things the same way I do. If there are dirty dishes, they should go in the dishwasher. If there are crumbs on the carpet, pull out the vacuum.
But I'm learning, at least at their age, they aren't necessarily wired that way. They'll do the work if I ask them, but noticing things like that proactively? Not so much.
Just like my car, I think we need to start stating the obvious a bit more.
How about trying on a few of these?
I could really use a hug, it's been a rough day
I would love it if you helped me make dinner
Here's a list of a couple of chores you can do after school
I want to spend more time together, just the two of us
I would like us to talk more about (insert topic here)
That color looks wonderful on you
You kicked ass in that meeting today
I'm proud of you
I appreciate the way you helped me with (insert job here)
I love you
Let's stop assuming that we can read each other's minds, and start speaking them.
This may seem obvious to some of you who have already come to learn this concept.
But I felt like I needed to say it anyway.
Because sometimes the things that seem so obvious really aren't obvious at all.