I was in the car yesterday with my youngest son, Jacob, and we were talking about the scar on the back of my hand. It's a new one - I got it from a cut a few weeks ago when I was carrying a TV downstairs and caught the corner of it on my hand.
I was lamenting about my scar and how ugly it was, holding it up against the sunlight.
He simply looked at me and said, "Mom, it's part of you now, you just need to accept it. Scars represent where we've been."
I know he's right. This nearly 12-year-old child can be really deep sometimes. He sees the world through such a unique lens.
Scars truly do represent where we've been - they're a reminder of things we've survived and, like our choices, shape who we are.
Here are a few of mine:
The chicken pox scar on my cheek from when I was a kid.
I barely see it anymore, but I can still remember how itchy I was!
The dent in the dining room table where I dropped a stapler on it so many years ago. It was only a week old and the most expensive purchase Tom and I had made when we moved into our first home in Oconomowoc.
I can still remember how it felt when it happened and how disappointed I was that I had "ruined" the new table.
The memory of when we told our boys that mom and dad were splitting up.
I can still feel the guilt and fear and conflicting emotions. I'm grateful for how things have played out since then, but forever scarred by that experience.
The hole in my heart from the day we found out my dad had passed.
I still have fear every time I can't get a hold of someone I love for more than a few days.
The empty place in my soul where my mom was supposed to be as I was growing up.
I still can't quite fill it with acceptance, but I'm beginning to understand how this scar has made me so much stronger.
Regardless of whether our scars are visible to the naked eye, or live only within our hearts and our minds, it's important that we acknowledge that they are part of who we are.
Each of us has a unique set of scars that create our life story. Embrace yours, build on the things that have happened to you that made you grow, and accept the things that no longer add value as life experience.
I'm seeing the scar on my hand in a whole new light this morning.
And it's beginning to grow on me.