When my dad passed away, I inherited something of his that was always an interesting conversation piece.
It's a life-size knight in shining armor. We lovingly call him "George."
George stands guard next to the fireplace in my family room.
Even as I sit here on the couch, writing this blog, George is watching over me. And I feel a little bit of my dad's presence when I look at him.
George is fully protected, from head to toe, complete with shield and some sort of dangerous-looking weapon in his right hand.
He's ready for battle. Nothing's getting through that armor of his.
I think about my dad and the suit of armor he wore. Not a physical one, but one that he put on to hide his troubles so people wouldn't see him struggle.
He would always tell us he was fine...until he wasn't.
It's sad sometimes to think about that. How letting people in and asking for help may have been the one thing that could have saved him from himself.
I wear a suit of armor too most days. I think many people do.
It's hard to be vulnerable and let people see the raw truth about our lives. To talk openly about the things that we are afraid of, the painful memories from our past that haunt us, or the mistakes that we've made that we are ashamed to admit.
The armor protects us from people who might get too close and see who we really are.
The irony is that we all have sh*t in our lives that we don't want others to know about. We all feel fear, hurt and shame.
By walking around with our suits of armor on, we aren't actually protecting ourselves at all.
We're just missing out on true human connection.
I believe that connecting and sharing our struggles is actually the best way to help us work through the things that hurt, navigate the situations where we just don't know what to do next, and generally feel better about our lives.
I had a long overdue girls' night with my best friend on Friday and we spent it catching up on life.
Just being able to sit with her and talk openly about the things that I'm struggling with was therapeutic.
We didn't solve anything.
There was no epiphany or magic solution to the issues at work that are overwhelming me, or the fact that I am almost 44 years old and still single, or the daily challenges of being a working mom and balancing all of the logistics of life.
But we laid it all out there. We talked, we laughed, we waxed nostalgic for our younger years, and we sat together on my couch and just enjoyed being there to support each other.
And that's what mattered.
Every once in awhile, it's a good idea to take off your suit of armor.
Show someone what's underneath it; the good, the bad and the ugly.
I think you'll find it will lighten the weight of the struggles you carry in your head and your heart.
I'm grateful to have George to represent a piece of my dad and something that was special to him.
He serves as a reminder to me as well, of just how important it is to find ways to be my true self.
Thanks George (and Dad)...I needed that.